Kia ora koutou for my writing today we had a story starter that was on a mysterious paper bag and we had to adapt on it I turned mine into a horror story here is my writing.
The horror in the bag -
One day Miss Cassidy brings a bag into school and leaves it on her desk then rushes out of the room with the speed of light, as the kids were wondering what they did wrong,
Cleo goes up to the bag and takes a peak inside and sees 5 mysterious creatures, as Mark started
to hear roaring echoing through the room, Cleos eyes wide in shock. The classes hearts leaped like
lightning as the mysterious creatures rose from the bag with a deadly smile that could stab
through your heart.
Just when the class noticed what was happening they jumped off their
seats and started to run in horror though it was already too late for most of them they had been
gobbled up by the hungry devils. Only Cleo and Mark had survived the attack
but just then a schoolshooter had busted through the hallway door and had
an AR-15! blood all on her face covered with sin and regrets. Cleo and Mark ran in fear they happened
to come across a closet
that they had never seen before they opened the old rotten door.
As it creaked they heard loud
footsteps they quickly hid in the closet and came across a box
that had a gun that even Mark's
gun expertise did not recognise. as Mark stared into the carved
writing it said est 1455.
As the footsteps got closer a roaring bell started to go off
they knew it would have been a lock down as they were about
to run the school shooter had come and shot both of them
through their brains and they fell in horror there last words
with blood flowing out of there mouths was never forget me.
THE END.
Aries' feedback: I like the use of the intense plot of the story and the
use of descriptive words to explain the characters. I think something
that would make this story better would be ]speech and onomatopoeia.
And I think most stories are supposed to have a solution.
